Developing a plan of action

Some goals or projects can appear overwhelming, intimidating and time consuming. They may scare you into a state of procrastination, nervousness or numbness. 

-Start by acknowledging that your current state doesn’t contribute to your happiness and your expectations in life. That you need to start this change or undertake this challenge for your own sake and no one else's.

-Decide what makes you happy. Factor in your long term and short term happiness and your ultimate goals in your life.

-Determine the steps toward achieving that goals. If the goal is too big and far away in your mind, try to break it down into smaller and more manageable parts.

-Write down every step and determine the prerequisites and preparations for achieving each step. Write those down too!

-Estimated a timeline and a due date to complete each task and step. Be realistic and also generous in your estimate. If a task needs 6 weeks to complete, give it another one or two weeks in your timeline. This would reduce your anxiety, margins in errors and setbacks, gives you time to go over everything and maybe enough time for a do-over.

-Get to work and take that first step. Start the first task right now, not tomorrow, not next week or next month.

Good luck! You can do it, you have the resolve and the resources. Go get what you want!

Don't be afraid!

Conquering fear and starting over

After you suffer a failure or setback, it is extremely difficult and sometimes scary to start over. The fear of failure in addition to the stress and the anxiety associated with beginning a new project or making a decision and the fear of unknown can be overwhelming. It can be paralyzing and if you are a champion procrastinator like me, you may never recover from that loss and failure. You may stay in your scared state for a very long time, afraid to change, to live or to even take a tiny step outside of your comfort zone.

 I have found out that a few strategic thoughts and planning can make risk taking (or starting over) a lot easier.

-Recognize and accept your fear. What is it that makes you most stressed about starting this new project? Which is worse, starting and losing again or staying in your unhappy place forever?

-Acknowledge the fact that failure is part of life. That you may lose again and it won’t be worse than what you are going through right now. There are very few situations and challenges in life that failure will literary equal to death. Almost nothing in the course a lifetime is literally fatal. Accept and acknowledge that if you fail again, you still have your life! Anxiety comes from “Fight or Flight” mindset, ingrained in our genes by our cave-dwelling ancestors. However there is almost no situation extreme enough in our lives to need such a reaction. We sometimes need to consciously think about the matter and change an unconscious fear into a conscious thought.

-Develop a step by step map for achieving your goal. Breaking an ultimate big target into little steps (that can be achieved with little effort) is helpful and puts the goal into perspective.

-Have a “Fall back” plan. Make a list of your resources and reassure yourself that you still have options if you fail in your new endeavor. Taking risks will become easier when you know you still have the security of your current place in life to fall back on if things go wrong.

-Remember all the challenges you’ve completed, all the frightful situations you have gone through and all the hardship you have suffered before. You got over them and you flourished and you are here a better stronger person, aren’t you? Gather your courage, you can do this too.

-Remind yourself that the project or challenge will not last forever or to the end of your life. It will take some time (a few years at the most) but someday it will end. Keep the end in mind.

-Think about how achieving that goal will make you feel. Concentrate on that feeling of success and joy, feel how strong you will be, how happy, how accomplished.

Now, get up and take that first step of you plan. You know you can do it!

Hello 2015!

A couple of weeks into the new year and I'm still gathering my thoughts and planning my course. I feel as if I'm still catching my breath from all the chaos of 2014.

2014 was a year full of up and downs, lots of good times and equal amount bad times. I traveled a lot and moved four times. I got to spend two months with my dad. I went through the stress of house hunting, job hunting and interviews. I moved to a new state, start a job, met lots of new people, learned new skills, moved house twice when I was there and lived with roommates (housemates actually) for the first time in my life. I also lost that job at the end of the year. I saw a colorful autumn and shivered in snow for the first time in fifteen years. I got really happy and really sad. I found a wonderful friend and lost the friendship of a few not so wonderful persons. I learned to appreciate my lifestyle more. I found the dept of my strength and the assurance that I can relay on myself. I became more confident. I decided to make happiness my priority in life, to enjoy the moments, to appreciate and to be grateful.

What will happen in 2015? I don't know but I know for sure I am up for any challenge. My personal goals are to practice mindfulness and to be happy. My professional goal is following a path that brings me long term happiness.